5YR OLD (playing xbox): "Yay, weed! Those were flowers but all the rest is weed."
ME to 12YR OLD: "Is he serious?"
5YR OLD: "I love weed."
ME to 12YR OLD: "WHAT?! Why is he saying that?!!?! Is there really weed on that game?!"
5YR OLD: "Weed is so awesome. I've got all the weed in the world!"
ME: "12YO! OMG! 5YO! GET OFF THAT GAME!"
12YR OLD: "What, why?!"
5YR OLD: "Weed, weed, weed. I'm harvesting my weed."
ME: "!!!!!! *points*"
12YR OLD: "MOM! He's playing Minecraft. It's WHEAT."
ME: "Oh. Carry on."