Friday, December 30, 2011


My heart is heavy. Everyday for the past two weeks, since this little girl  went missing from her father's home (15 min from here), I've eagerly checked the online news several times a day hoping upon hope that I'd read the words "Ayla's been FOUND!" But as time passes, and her father remains in hiding, while her mother whores herself out to every media outlet that waves a free plane ticket in her face, the feeling that a happy ending will occur is fading.

We watched as K-9 units and rescue teams searched the blocks near the high traffic area where Ayla Rey,nolds lives. Hugged our little ones tighter as the dedicated men and women hard at work tirelessly looking for Ayla, drained the rivers overnight, to search the riverbeds the next morning for clues, with help from airplanes.

Of course, when things like this happen across the country, you check up on it the case of Caylee Anth,ony. I watched and was apalled by how that all went down. My heart aches for all the sweet babies who go missing or worse. But when it happens in your own back yard, so to speak, it shakes you. Wondering if your own children played alongside this one at McD's or the nearby playground we frequented this fall.

Last night, I was restless. And found myself thinking of Ayla once again. I watch far too many episodes of Criminal Minds, SVU, NCIS, etc., but what they have shown me is that a lot of times, the one clue that breaks the whole case open makes you want to slap yourself on the forehead, cuz it was that simple and was overlooked the whole time. I thought well, if this is a case of parental kidnapping (there is a custody battle ensuing and Ayla has a broken arm), then whoever took her hopefully loves her enough to put her in a carseat. Ooooh, or maybe, the parent slipped up and gave them her OWN carseat! Or are on surveillance leaving one of the few department stores in the area, carrying a carseat. I forwarded my thought to the PD and could only hope for the best again today.

But today, the best didn't come. Tonight, they've changed the status of Ayla's case from missing person to a criminal case, involving foul play.

The definitions I found...FOUL PLAY: violence, especially MURDER. Unfair or dishonest behavior (especially involving murder). Synonyms: blood, homocide, murder, rubout, slaying.


Please let this sweetheart be okay.

(I cant get a pic to post from my tablet, but if I could it would've been the one of her sweet smile and chubby wrists *swoon*)

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

WW: All I want for Christmas...

Monday, November 7, 2011

If you give a mouse Mom a bagel...

I've been trying to kill catch a mouse.
Little bastard guy keeps setting off the trap and getting away with the loot. 
Before setting the trap last night, I was hungry, so I stuck a bagel in the toaster (we'll blame the time change on this would-be midnight snack)
Then I got to work on setting the mouse trap...after all, I had the peanut butter out for my bagel anyway. 
So, I smeared the trap up, surprisingly got it to stay set on my first try (lots of practice last night...bastard...grumble), but I wanted it closer to the dishwasher, cuz I think my wittle fwiend is under there laughing at me hanging out. 
I was using a spoon to slide the set trap gently across the floor (I think I was holding my breath, even), when 


My bagel popped up.
And I peed my pants. 
The end.

Sunday, November 6, 2011



I can't believe how much toilet paper we go through. There are 6 pen!ses and ONE vajayjay in this house...and I'm always scraping the roll. What the sh.. Oh... riiiight.

I wrote 2 emails this past week having to apologize to 2 teachers for my oldest's disrespectful and disruptive chatter...which means, I should probably forward it to his 4 other teachers. But the detention he served, our "talk", taking his phone away and changing his FB password for 2 weeks should hopefully do the come "good parenting" never leaves me feeling good??

There's a mouse in the house. Fascinating, eh? The little (or...I'm beginning to think...not-so-little) effer set off the same trap last night and got away with the loot! Maybe he was watching that hamster spy movie with us last week.

I can't believe it's "the holiday season" already. Booooooooo. If you're looking for ideas for me, I like diamonds...and toilet paper.

By Fadra:  This was my 5 minute Stream of Consciousness Sunday post. It’s five minutes of your time and a brain dump. Want to try it? Here are the rules…
  • Set a timer and write for 5 minutes only.
  • Write an intro to the post if you want but don’t edit the post. No proofreading or spellchecking. This is writing in the raw.
  • Publish it somewhere. Anywhere. The back door to your blog if you want. But make it accessible.
  • Add the Stream of Consciousness Sunday badge to your post.
  • Link up your post here. .
  • Visit your fellow bloggers and show some love.


My 5 Angry Birds. The black and blue costumes I had to make...with a little TLC...and lots of hot glue!

Thursday, April 21, 2011

I would take an organ from a skunk...

"I would take an organ from a skunk...if it would save my child's life."

That's a response my friend posted on facebook today, in response to an MSNBC article entitled, "Killer's quest: Allow organ donation after execution."  I have to say, that's my initial maternal response as well.

The request is from an Oregon prisoner who killed his wife and children a decade ago, by (according to the article) strangling the wife and 2yr old before stuffing their bodies in suitcases and throwing them in the ocean, and tying pillowcases full of rocks to the feet of his 3 and 4yr old and throwing them in icy December Oregon water. Alive.

Later on facebook, another mom brought up a valid point...would I want the heart of a killer in my child?  Eventually, she came to the same conclusion...if it would save my child, yes.

How could you not?

Sitting there, dangling in front of you is the organ that will take the pain and sickness away from your child or relative.  Your option would be for them to continue living --and eventually dying-- in a hospital, or accepting a donated organ from a prisoner and giving them back the life they deserve.  Aren't organ donations kept anonymous anyway? (Clearly I don't know, and *knock on wood* won't have to find out, but I think I saw this on an episode of Grey's or something)

I do have to say, I don't like the way this particular prisoner is going about this.  He's threatening to continue appeals and prolonging his execution for another 10 years if officials don't agree to let him donate his organs.  But, if they do agree to it, he'll accept execution in 90 a way to relieve his conscience.

That part pisses me off, actually.  It's like negotiating with a child.  Do what I want or I'm taking my toys organs and going back to my room cell.

I was reading the article thinking, again..."How could you not?" How could you, as a prison/state official NOT let these people donate their organs to the approximately 19 people who are dying in America each day, while waiting for an organ donation from a stroke or accident victim?!

And then I got to this paragraph:  "Living prisoners may be allowed to donate organs, but it's decided on a case-by-case basis at the state and federal levels, officials say.  Typically such donations are limited to immediate family members when theres a confirmed organ match, with the inmate's and recipient's families agreeing to foot the bill for all medical and security costs."

So there you have it, folks.  It's all about the Benjamins.

If you're interested, the prisoner has a facebook page and op-ed article you can access through the article.

WHAT DO YOU THINK, MAMAS?  Would you accept an organ from a prisoner?!

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

WW---My Mind's in the Gutter

Tuesday, April 5, 2011


"Wow, I have a big brain!" ~Ashitoner

Friday, April 1, 2011

Flashback Friday---Kisses or Pinches?

Here's a quick little snippet from St. Patrick's Day LAST year.  

LukeyBaby(age 7) came downstairs wide-eyed this morning: "MOM! Do you know what Phoebe told me?! She said if you wear green today, you get a kiss (with the girls-have-cooties face); and if you don't, you get a pinch."

I giggled as I shielded my eyes from the blazing orange outfit he was wearing.  After explaining the higher probability of getting pinched by all the boys in his class, he came out of his closet in head-to-toe camouflage.

Ashitoner (age 9) was then reminded of SPD and was on the hunt for some green. It was close to bus time so I entered his closet, threw him a pair of jeans, some (coincidentally) green underwear, and a blue shirt with green letters on it.
"That's not green!"
"Bud, you don't have to have a green shirt, just something with green on it."
"But what if one of the guys comes up behind me and pinches me cuz I have a blue shirt on."
"Well, (not my proudest parenting moment) pinch 'em back! And if they don't think it's enough green, you could always pull your pants down."
Picturing that phone call from the principal, I added the fine print: "That was not me giving you permission to pull your pants down, by the way!"

Mom: "Happy St. Patrick's Day, Jakester!"
Jakester (age 3--flashing back to freaking out last week when a mom dressed as Dr. Seuss): "It's Patrick's Day?!! Is he gonna be at my school?!"

I originally posted this on my "old" blog.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

WW---No Exit


Monday Mingle 3.28.11

Current questions {week of 3/28/11}:
1. What is your favorite song right now?
2. How good are you about using coupons at the grocery store?
3. Do you have a Smartphone? If so what are your top 3 games/apps?

YouTube Tuesday---Eat Your Vitamins!!

For those of us who need encouragement to take our vitamins :D

Monday, March 28, 2011

Spring has Sprung??!

I pretend to use my cell as an alarm clock.  Usually, the kids digging in the cupboards for some grub wake me up first.

One morning recently, I was awoken by a text message.
From my son.
In his bed upstairs.
"Mom, I'm wicked sick. Can I stay home today?"
From my bed, I texted back:  "Ash, it's a snow day."
And just like that, he was cured.

Miracles do happen.

Now for some I-wish-Spring-would-hurry-the-F-up-and-get-sprung-already-pics...
Icy treetops

Spring mud + 4wheeler = Muddy Boy


Ready for baseball to start!

Such a good big bro

Come'on bud, let's go inside and warm up


Friday, March 25, 2011

"The Fish Say..."

I found a video from the summer when we were looking at an aquarium in a mall when we in Ohio.  Gradster wanted to show me what the fish say...notice his lips <3

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

EASIEST Kid-friendly Lunch EVERRR! Cheap, too!

Like corn dogs?  Try Corndog Muffins!! (I got this recipe from a group on Cafemom)

All you need is a pack of your favorite hotdogs and 2-3 boxes of Jiffy corn muffin mix.

Prepare mix as directed (add milk and egg) and stir in sliced hotdogs (note: cheese dogs might add some more flavor).  Fill greased muffin tins 1/2 full.  Bake 10-15 min.  Add a veggie to the plate.  Voila.  Lunch!!

I was thinking maybe next time, I'd try adding the green beans INTO the mix.  Then a friend said she always puts a can of corn in her cornbread every time she makes it as a sidedish.

Genius!  Meat + veg + cornmeal = a whole meal in a muffin :)

My boys were VERY excited to eat lunch in the form of a "cuppycake."  And even though Gradster was a little disappointed with the lack of sprinkles on his, I think he's on his fourth muffin.

These will be GREAT when baseball and soccer seasons kick in and we have to eat quickly on the run!!

What would you add to it?

Tuesday, January 25, 2011


"One day I'm gonna whistle?"

*gush* *gush* *swoon*

She makes my ovaries hurt lol

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

*slaps forehead*

{Scene: A mother and her two sons, aged 8 & 10 are finishing up their lunch at a quiet restaurant on a snowy day. The only other patrons are a pair of elderly friends meeting for lunch}

     OLDEST SON: "O.M.G. I'm soooooooooooooooo full!" *moaning*

     MOTHER:  "Shhhhhhhh!  Please don't be rude, there are other customers!" *nodding in direction of the elderly ladies in the booth right behind him*

     YOUNGER SON:  *scolds his older brother loudly* "Yeah!  Those old ladies are trying to enjoy their lunch! Geez."

     MOTHER:  *slaps forehead*  "Check, please!"

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

WW-11 for my 10 on 1-11-11










SO EASY IN FACT THAT HE SKIPPED 2ND GRADE (Mama's gotta brag a bit)



Sunday, January 9, 2011

What, you were expecting Santa??!?!

My 4yr old had a doctor's appointment recently. We were at a specialist that he'd never met before, so the doctor was trying to make smalltalk.

DOCTOR: "How was your Thanksgiving?"


DOCTOR: "Did you eat lots of turkey?"

JAKESTER: "Mmhmm."

DOCTOR: "Do you know what's coming up?"

JAKESTER: shrugged

DOCTOR: "You don't know?! Who's the big guy coming to your house dressed in a red suit?"

JAKESTER: "Ummmmmmm...a lobster?"

(In his defense, he did have lobster on maybe that's where that came from LOL)

We were 2 hours from home for the appointment, so we decided to make it a Mom & Jakester day.

He requested lunch at "Friendly-Fire." HUH?! Took me a minute to figure out Friendly's.

Then my sweet little innocent baby boy told our waitress that she talks like Lois from "Family Guy." Ummm, yeah...I don't think the older boys are watching Nickelodeon before bed anymore...naughties.

A couple weeks later, I had his first Parent/Teacher Conference. The teachers showed me a poster that they made the previous morning during circle time, in which they asked each child, "What makes you happy?" and wrote their replies on the poster.

Jakester's reply: Going to lunch at Friendly-Fire with my mom, she had buffalo chicken salad and I had chocolate milk.

(DISCLAIMER: He had hotdogs and macaroni, too, but I'm thinking chocolate milk was the highlight.)

Thursday, January 6, 2011

I was gonna redo that bathroom anyway...

I know I'm supposed to like, "embrace their creativity" or some shit but when their creativity causes them to use toothpaste and shaving cream to stick cardboard, maxipads, christmas paper, hot chocolate wrappers and pieces of the bathroom border (that they ripped off) to the side of the bathroom sink, I start to question that.

So, I did...question that.  They're reply?!

"Cuz we're leaving messages for Perry the Platypus."
Photo from google images
 The next day, the bathroom bandits struck again......... Yes, those are q-tips coming out his ears.  And yes, I got my phone to take a pic of the little bugger before I scolded him.  That's how I roll.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011


Monday, January 3, 2011

The Case of the Missing Laundry Detergent

I have 5 boys.  You know that.  You have kids, too.  You also know that kids = laundry.  5 kids = a mountain range of laundry that make the Rockies look like an anthill.  *sigh* I wish that was an exaggeration.

It all started about 3 weeks ago.  I'd run to town for a quick grocery trip and grab a jug of laundry detergent.  I would of course, procrastinate accidently forget to do the laundry once I got home, so I set the jug on the washer.

When I finally got a chance to do some laundry, the jug was almost empty.  What the...?  Didn't I just buy that like 72 hours ago???!

Husband is usually good about doing his own laundry when he's out of jeans a load or two here and there, so maybe it was him, I thought...but the musty smell coming from the washer told me otherwise.

Fastforward another day or two and I grabbed another jug at the store.


Where the flip is all the laundry detergent going?!  I asked the inhabitants of my house.

No answer.

I again bought laundry detergent at the store and this time...just to help prove my sanity...I asked my husband for "help" bringing in the groceries.  He set the jug on the washer.

The next morning I get up and go to start a load of laundry.  Empty.


So I dial my husband.  "Husband, I'm going to ask you something and I want you to really...think...about...the answer...before you give it to me...Did I or did I not just buy a gawd dayum jug of laundry detergent?!"

Husband, point 2 seconds later:  "Uhhhhh, I don't know, did you?"


I campaigned for my sanity for a day or two (I even used the sitter as a witness sounding board, joking the kids were probably dumping it down a heating duct or something) and sooner or later the laundry issue was once again forgotten for a couple weeks.

Until yesterday.

Husband started doing some after-dinner dishes, so I decided to conquer a laundry mountain or two.  I donned my ipod and tuned the crazies kids out and tuned Adam Lambert and The Black Eyed Peas in...Imma be be be be...doing laundry.

Soon, the kids were running amok and I was dodging icy stares from the dishwasher my husband, so we tried to settle them into the living room for a quick game before bed.

But someone was missing.

*slam* goes the washing machine lid.

"Grady, what are you doing?!"

3 yr old:  "Ummmmmm, nuffing."  And he joined us in the living room.

Upon sending the kids in to brush teeth 15 or so minutes later, they screamed, "Bubbles!! woohoo, bubbles!"

What the........*crickets*  Who the f is Bubbles?!

Well, let me tell you.  Bubbles is the result of a 3 year old dumping numerous bottles of laundry detergent into the washing machine and once spin cycle occurs, bubbles every.single. toilet, sink, tub, shower, and drain in our house.

Mystery solved.

And the toilets took a little less elbow grease to clean this a.m. :)

Saturday, January 1, 2011


I was feelin' a little fat old (hence the reNEWed ME) to go out for New Year's Eve, so we decided to rock out at home with My Many Men.

An attempt at a group pic...

Decorations were hung,
and of course, there was nachos, yum!
Mom made us pose for pics in our pajamas attire.
Here's Mr. Fever......he was in bed early, but got up just in time to see the ball drop.
Play that funky music...
They loved it!

But our "tupid" glasses wouldn't stay on...
So we all got naked and drank champagne!
JUST was only Sprite, I swear!
Oh, Waiter!
We hope your 2011 is grand!