5QF-- Frat boys, Zzzzs, and Bangs :)

Joining in Five Question Friday at fivecrookedhalos.blogspot.com!

Even though it's technically 4 minutes into Saturday as I type. Anywhooo...

1. Would you rather pay for house cleaner or spa day?

At first, I was like, hellooooooooooo, house cleaner! But the truth is? I'd be so embarrassed by the messes My Many Men make that I'd have to CLEAN the house so the house cleaner could come.  

Source: someecards.com

So...I'm going with SPA!! I've never had a massage.

2. Who plans what gifts you get for holidays, you or your spouse?

We don't honestly do a lot of gifts for each other. If I want something, I get it. If he wants something, I talk him out of it. Haaaaaa. I'm so picky particular, it's easier to plan them myself. Less exchanges that way ;)

3. How many hours of sleep do you get? Do you need more?

Sometimes 5, sometimes 8ish. It depends on my caffeine consumption mood, I guess. And how many blogs I have in my reader :) Tonight...I'm shooting for 6 hours. Who doesn't need more---in the form of an afternoon nap!!

4. Do you like your hair long or short?

Long. I'm never sure about my bangs though...no bang, side bang, heavy bang. Bang. *snicker*

5. When was the last time you were pulled over and what was it for?

It's been almost a couple years I think...and it was an expired inspection sticker. I gave 'em the 'ole "I had no idea, my husband takes care of that stuff even though I harp on him weekly."

That was fun. If you wish to partake, visit Mama M. at

5QF--Weeds, Snow, & Long Car Rides

In the interest of having some posts consistency around these parts, I'm participating in Mama M's

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1. What is a hobby you would love to learn and why? 

     Hmmmmmmmmmm...I think I would choose gardening...for starters.  The why is cuz...I can't. These ole thumbs are black. And because flowers are pretty! So if you have any pointers or favs or anything else to share...please comment below! Our backyard is 99% shadowed by mid-afternoon...so what grows well in the shade? (Besides weeds...I'm GREAT at those)

2. What do you wish you could have delivered to your house but does not deliver?

     Olive Garden! But it's probably just as well they don't...as I put the finishing touches on my weightloss blog earlier today :/

3. What's your favorite snow day activity? Inside and out?

     I love fall. Sweater weather, crisp breezes, beautiful foliage. I do not love winter. BUT I suppose if I have to choose, snowtubing? We did that with the kids before and it was quite fun. And cold. But fun.  Inside is easy...snuggles, blankets, movies, kiddos, and couch. 'Nuff said.

4. Would you meet a stranger from an Internet dating site?

     Do people still do that? Didn't I see on Dr. Phil that there's a bunch of scammers on that?  Anywho, I hope I never have to find out, but honestly, I think I'd choose NO.

5. If you had to spend 35 hours in a car with 4 other people, who would you choose? 

     Been there, done that. My Many Men and I drove to Ohio to visit my sis a couple summers ago. I'm thinking of doing the same this year, only going further...if I don't lose my nerve and the wee bit of sanity I have remaining... So, since you've requested 4, I'll answer 4 of my 5 boys.  I'm not saying that I have favorites cuz you're not supposed to but I will say that of the 5 there's one who is my LEAST favorite on car trips. He'd like a 4 foot radius around him in the car. Hell, wouldn't we all.

5QF-- Twinkies, trash, and sweaty pants.

In the interest of having some posts consistency around these parts, I'm participating in Mama M's

Join in here!

Ready?  *Ahem*

1. If you could have been (could be) any profession you wanted (brains and $$$ no problem) what would it be?

I've been thinking a lot about this lately, with all the kiddos headed back to school full-time...maybe it's time for this momma to get back into the workforce.  Atleast part-time.  Anywho, what I enjoy most is greeting people and office work.  So, an office position of some sort would be amazeballs.  And on the practical side of things, it'd have to be either a night job or just during the school year, so as to not pay daycare (because helloooo, what would be the point in THAT!) which leaves me with the position of School Secretary. Home on weekends and vacation days/holidays. Perfect. Set that up for me, wouldya?

2. How often do you clean out your car?

Blech. Not often enough. I usually take the hint when they open the sliders of the fan and a bunch of shit falls out. Actually, I've been doing rather okay with it...emptying trash into the outside can on Friday mornings (trash day) and when I step on shit that just fell out when they opened the door when I get the urge.  But, alas, *sigh* not nearly often enough.

3. Do you wish there was such a thing as fashion police or are you deeply relieved?

I would be okay with that...I've tried to make it a rule not to leave the house in sweatpants. But rules are meant to be broken, amIright!? Sooooo. Either way is fine. I'd probably just contest the ticket and fight it in court, which would lead to the ticket getting thrown out, cuz the FP wouldn't show up, cuz there are FAR too many people out there worse off than moi! lol  My sister even said a few times, trying to be nice...I guess... *eyeroll* "She might be big, but atleast she dresses nice." Um. okay. Thanks. Or should I say, you're welcome? lol  {Evil revenge: she later popped out 2 kids of her own mwahahahahahahahaha} {but she's doing great losing on Weight Watchers...and stress} {biotch.}

4. What's your go to food/drink/activity when stressed?
I partake in Retail Therapy. Actual therapy would probably be cheaper, though. :/

5. If you had twins, what would you name them?

Hey! I've got some of those!! They are Gavin & Grady. Our youngest. Here are some pics...

Newborn Twinkies!

We're 2!! This pic makes me happy and sad!

A recent adventure with their bros...notice the "croc pots" in the background?

And no, they weren't in a Subway commercial...
They turned 5 this summer!

 (5, 5, 5 dollah foot looooooooooooooooooooong!)

Make a wish, twinkies!

Making the best of a rainy baseball game. Have Mike&Ike's...will travel.

Wanna know something COMPLETELY insane?! 

I'd love to have another set of twins! Right now. And their names would be Charlie and Max, or maybe Duncan (family name) OR if they were girls: Andy and Charlie. 

I know. ;)

5QF--Of Mice and Moms.

In the interest of having some posts consistency around these parts, I'm participating in Mama M's

Join in here!

Ready?  *Ahem*

1. What's the one thing you buy every time you walk into the store?

That, my friends, is a trick question.  There are sooooo many sub-parts to this question...for example a) which type of store? b) who's with me? c) is it just a I-gotta-bribe-them-with-a-POStoy-from-the-dollar-store trip or d) we talking grocery shopping or fun shopping?

Nevermind. I can make this easy on us all.

ANSWER: Nothing. There is no one thing that I buy every time I walk into the store. The PROBLEM now that we moved to the biiiiig city *wink* is that every time we go to the store, we find ourselves in a drive-thru, getting an ice coffee (the mister) or frappe (me).

And that's only if we have no children in tow...because they ask everygawdforsakingDAY for us to buy them candy. Especially Gavin.  This is his "Please buy me candy, you haven't bought be candy since YESTERDAY!" face:

"Pleaseyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy Pleeeeeeeeeeeease?"

"Mwahahahahahahaha...she said maybe. woot!"

"Go ask daddy??  I'm getting candy, I'm getting candy!"

And when all else fails, and I forget to bring him home some candy...

He just takes my frappe.
(Please excuse our hand-me-down couch in the "man cave")
(and the chicken nugget. sheesh.)

2. If you had a day all to yourself how would you spend it?

I've been in the honeymoon phase of parenting as of last September and not just because they all wipe their own ass. The youngest 2 of 5 started full day preK in our old town. Sadly, when we moved, they only had a 3 hour program here, but I took all the free time I could get didn't mind. I found myself in Target and Christmas Tree Shops a lot. Or out to eat a hot breakfast and neglect my gym membership. 

In 12 days and 9 hours (who's counting?) (me, that's who!!!), they start Kindergarten *faux dramatic sob* and all 5 will be back in school full days. And I'll probably be trying to find a part-time gig  back to neglecting my gym membership, whilst frolicking through stores shopping alone and not sharing my frappe...and maybe a side of water zumba {sidebar: have you done water zumba?  Likes? Dislike? It'll be my 1st time}  

3. Are you a speed limit driver? If not, over or under?

Over baby. Well, not so much over that it's criminal or unsafe...but I've got places to be {like the gawdforsaking orthodontist} and too many personalities men in my little van to be in it longer than I have to be.  I remember my freshman math teacher once said she traveled "3 under 10 over" the speed limit, which still echoes in my head sometimes, idk why always stuck with me. Weirdness.  "In town" though, I'm a speed limit driver. I save my extra 7 mph for the highway :)

4. What's your favorite dessert to make, homemade or from a mix??

I don't have one. More weirdness, I know!  My favorite dessert is pretty much ohhhhh, y'know...any.  I like to MAKE monkey munch or "trash" (crispix with choc and powder sugar) and could eat pumpkin chocolate chip cookies all winter long.  Rice Krispie treats piss me off (to make), especially when they come out all stale. But a chocolate cream pie is easy peasy to whip up (and the mister's favorite)! So basically, my answer would be: easy ones.

5. Would you rather have a spider or a mouse scurry across your face (no copping out and saying "neither!!")?

OMFG. I have a funny mouse story here. I guess if I have to choose, I'd *gulp* prefer a mouse scurry across my face than a spider; for several reasons. 1)I wouldn't have to worry about a mouse crawling up my nose or 2)laying eggs up there and 3)given the mouse:face size ratio...they will scurry across said face much more quickly and 4)*shudder*

I'm the kind of person who sees a bug, then feels a piece of hair tickle my arm and flips out calmly brushes that area, thinking there is a bug there.  It's a subtle move, really...one which I've perfected over the years.  It's like a brush/grab and then (and this is an important part:) wipe it on furniture, a pantleg, or the nearest child grass.

DUDE! 
(May I call you Dude?)

DUDE! One night a few weeks ago, I was settling down in bed when the opportunity arose to do the brush/grab/wipe off of a piece of hair that I felt on my forehead.  The brush/grab went great, but when I wiped on the sheet beside me, SOMETHING ROLLED UNDER MY FINGERS.

*commence freakout*

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! THERE WAS JUST A SPIDER ON MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! GETUPGETUPGETUPGETUP! OMG IS THERE MORE IN MY HAIR? CHECK MY HAIR. EWWWWWWWW. OMG OMG WHERE WAS IT GOING?!?! WHAT IF IT WENT UP MY NOSE?!"

My hero The mister turns on the light, and there on the wall was the arachnid's accomplice. We are not talking about one of those teeeeeeeeny jumping spiders who look like their mama jumped the web to mate with a bumble bee, nor a small-bodied daddy long legs.  Oh nooooooo. This motherlover was honkin'!  And I had his guts on my hand sheet to prove it.

After some xanax cleanup, flushing of the other spider, and me making him check my hair 472 a few times, the mister finally shut off the light and I tossed and twitched all night because HELLOOO there was just a spider on my forehead for cripes sake?!! we went to sleep. 

*twitch*

5QF-- Vibrators + Olympians all in one post. Nice.

In the interest of having some posts consistency around these parts, I'm participating in Mama M's

Join in here!

Ready?  *Ahem*

Q1. What's the funniest thing you've seen on facebook/twitter this week?

Y'know, I have to say, the twits peeps I follow on twitter are the funniest people on the planet.  I reserve my retweets for hilariously witty posts, wicked smahhhhht (that's my Maine-ah voice) ideas, and links to posts that I want to read at a later time.  I see so many funny things on twitter, so I'll share one I've seen in the past hour...or 57 minutes to be exact:

@kimcormack: I totally just saw a butterfly with a tattoo of a slut on its back #facts

Bwahahahahaha! Still funn-ay, even 58 minutes later.

Imma show you something funny from facebook, too...but FAIR WARNING:  It's naughty.  So if you're not into that (which really, come'on, you clicked on a blog with the P word in it...), then cover your eyes and click the down arrow like 17 times. Ready?

You have to admit, that's pretty freaking clever.  Anywhoooooooooo...

Q2. What is your favorite Olympic Event?

What a strategically timed question that is, eh? hehe. I'm a couch potato not athletic, but I much prefer the Winter games to the Summer ones.  The luge is exciting, that super long skiing jumpy thing where they catch huge air is great too, oh and speed skating is fun to watch.  That being said, if I had to choose a favorite Summer game, it would be gymnastics.  Those athletes are so young! And talented! and poised! and muscular!  They amaze me. 

Please excuse me while I go off on a tangent here But I gotta say...the REAL heroes of the Olympic games? The parents. Well, yes, the athletes are amazeballs, I mean, they do the twirling, jumping, flipping stuff, but everyone of them wouldn't be there if it wasn't for a parent/guardian recognizing or even just SUPPORTING their talent/love for their sport early on in their very young lives.  The parents did the early a.m. wakeups, the driving a bazillion (give or take) miles to the gym/pool, the packing of the right leotards, the hairbraiding, and hell, the paying for all the lessons. Those are their babies out there in that water or on that beam.  Their own blood, sweat (I guess, if it's tennis they gotta watch), and tears are poured into their children...those are their babayyyyyys out there on that mat.  What an out-of-this-world proud moment that must be.

I have a swim mom and a gymnast mom that are friends of mine on ye 'ole FB.  One is local, one I met at Mom Congress.  I see their "check-ins" that were posted from the pool HOURS before I even thought of cracking an eyelid open; and their weeks at competitions that are out of state...their whole family's lives are put on hold so that their children can do what they love, and dream to do.  It's so inspiring and beautiful to watch. tear-filled rant over

Q3. a)Do your kids do chores around the house? {I skipped parts b) and c) here because DAMMIT! They don't apply}  Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh! This is an ongoing battle that I start and stop multiple times throughout the year.  Currently, my children are not "assigned" chores.  Will they empty this dishwasher or switch the laundry over if I tell them to? They damn well better if they ever want to touch that game controller again Yes, but not without equal parts complaining and trying to rationalize why another sibling should be doing it. And just this week, they've been clearing their plates off the table, usually after some yelling reminders.  All that took was the kitten shitting on one of them twice getting an upset stomach from eating the food.  I'm lazy inspired by the chore charts and cutesy magnets I see on pinterest. I guess it's time!!! I'm very much looking forward to reading everyone else's answers!

Q4. If you get bad food/service, do you complain or keep quiet?

If somethings not right with a food order, or if something is undercooked, like a steak, then yes...I'll say something.  I wouldn't label that as complaining...just bringing it to their attention and asking for it to be rectified, in a discreet manner.  Usually I'm more apologetic than them, to keep them running, but you get what you pay for! Having been "in the biz," the staff is FULLY aware when they aren't being attentive enough. If a waiter/waitress is rude, though, I'll hit 'em where it hurts...the tip. 

Q5. If you could pick one frivolous item for your home, what would it be?

More welcoming neighbors? haha jk. Ummmmmmmmmm...since we are renting, I can't do any MAJOR changes...so how's about a 24 foot pontoon boat for the driveway??!  YES PLEASE!  Momma wants to go mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmotorboatin'!!

Well, this was fun!! I look forward to reading everyone else's replies as well.  Link up!